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Shawn Green received a peer review by Wikipedia editors, which is now archived. It may contain ideas you can use to improve this article.

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Jewish-American

Isn't it enough to simply say he is Jewish, not Jewish-American? Especially in that context? I pose the question, rather than reverting it, so you can revert it .......

From the opening para it is apparent that he is American.

--Epeefleche 00:16, 2 February 2007 (UTC)[reply]

My issue was more about consistency with the other Jewish NY Mets (Shoeneweis, Newhan). It is redundant but I think its all-right as is. Agree/Disagree? SERSeanCrane 03:28, 2 February 2007 (UTC)[reply]

I could go either way. I guess my preference would be to go your way, but in the opening paragraph. It seems least artificial to say it your way, but to avoid being redundant that would be the place I imagine it would go. But others may of course differ. Cheers. --Epeefleche 05:59, 5 February 2007 (UTC)[reply]

I took out the American part, as it says right on top that he was born in Des Plaines, Illinois. Duprees62 00:43, 13 May 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Former Teams

I took out the "former teams" section near the top because it included the Mets, and he is still on the Mets. I probably shouldn't have done it, looking back on it, and I apologize to whoever put it in. I meant to just take the Mets out of the list because he's still on the Mets, but I didn't know how to do it, and accidentally deleted the other teams. If you want to put the other teams back in, feel free to put them in. Just leave the Mets out, as he's still with the Mets. Once again, I apologize. Duprees62 00:48, 13 May 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Hey Dupree--sounds like an honest mistake, and though it wasn't my contribution that you deleted I don't understand why you don't just fix it yourslef, rather than write this note?Epeefleche 02:53, 14 May 2007 (UTC)[reply]

There's a simple answer to that, Epeefleche. I don't know how to! If I understood that technical stuff, I wouldn't have made the mistake in the first place. I'm still relatively new to Wikipedia. From now on, though, I'll try to not do things that are obviously "over my head." But, what the heck, maybe I'll take your advice and at least try to fix it myself. I just hope that I don't screw up the whole article, as I feel that it's an excellent one. Duprees62 03:10, 14 May 2007 (UTC)[reply]

No. I just tried to fix it for about a half an hour, but I couldn't do it. Duprees62 03:48, 14 May 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Review by Midnightdreary

This is one of the few leads I've seen that is too long. Consider clipping away at it. Check out WP:LEAD to get a good idea of how it's done. In essence, it should serve as a stand-alone "mini" article for those that choose not to read the whole thing. As I understand it, it should also summarize and introduce what the article is going to discuss in more detail. You also should be careful about single-sentence paragraphs; try to always have three sentences (personal recommendation; not sure what FAC reviewers would say).

By the way, using numbers in sports articles can be hard. Generally, for non-stats related info, go with writing the full word for the number for smaller numbers. Case in point, the fourth paragraph: "He is one of only 4" should be "He is one of only four..." Done

The problem with this article throughout is sources. This would probably not pass a good article review. So, do some digging, get some sources (preferably print sources to balance the web sources). Really, I would suggest that editors stop working on adding info to this article and just work on verifying what's already there. See WP:RS and WP:CITE for some info.

Also, throughout, there are short single-sentences paragraphs that should be expanded or merged itno another 'graph. Done

I'd also consider turning the "Charitable work" section into prose rather than just another list; there's already plenty of list-based sections here. Done

There's also a trivia section in here. See WP:TRIVIA.

Best of luck. --Midnightdreary 13:09, 8 September 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Will mark done as generally addressed ... others are welcome to join in .. tx.--Epeefleche 07:35, 9 September 2007 (UTC)[reply]

VIOLATES NEUTRALNESS POLICY

There are many comments on him that are not neutral. When I change them, someone also reverts it. There is much information listed stating how he is "the greatest jewish (fill in category here, ex. lefty home run hitter, etc.) Nowhere does it say on Rickey Henderson's page that he is the all-time black stolen base leader, it just says he is the all-time leader. Are you saying we should make a separate listing for the Canadian, Dominican, Mexican, Columbian, Cuban, etc for every category? Unless this is thoroughly done, it is not neutral to write comments simply because he is Jewish. I am not simply trying to vandalize, but I feel that if there is a policy, all articles should adhere to it, not just certain ones. —Preceding unsigned comment added by 99.145.91.135 (talk) 19:00, 7 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Oops! I am really sorry I acted very quickly by looking at your edit summary and reverted. Sorry again! --SMS ^Talk 19:02, 7 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

What is wrong with Jewish-American? Jewish tells his ancestry, and American tells his current residence. Saying he is Jewish makes it sound like he is from Israel. J.delanoy ^gabs _adds 01:59, 10 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Are you seriously that ignorant? "Saying he is Jewish makes it sound like he is from Israel". Um, no, that would make him Israeli, not Jewish. Just because someone is Jewish does not mean that they are automatically from Israel. In the first sentence, it says he is from US. Why mention it seven more times? —Preceding unsigned comment added by 99.145.91.135 (talk) 14:58, 10 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

What is wrong with it saying he is Jewish-American? I fail to see what the problem is. J.delanoy ^gabs _adds 15:21, 10 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

More Violations of Neutralness/Fairness policy...

Why does this article make so many mentions of his religion... how come this is nowhere to be found on any currents superstars pages, such as Adrian Gonzalez, Jose Bautista, Ryan Howard, Prince Fielder, Paul Konerko... etc.... his religion shouldnt matter one bit when it comes to baseball — Preceding unsigned comment added by 99.141.119.218 (talk) 23:41, 26 June 2011 (UTC)[reply]

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